Emma's Advice, Clothes, Men and Marriage

Emma’s Advice
She had advice on everything I did. She asked me why I never dressed up at home. She said I should wear my best every day, even at home. You need to wear a waist, she’d tell me. I didn’t’t know what she meant. “A waise! A waise!” I thought she mean a waste, or the clothes I was “wasting” by not wearing them, until she showed me a blouse.
She also told me I shouldn’t’t let anyone in my home. “Let them wonder, hee hee. G’ve ‘em”something to worry about.” I thought it was a little funny that I should wear my best and then not let anyone see it.
“Stop showin’ everybody yo’ house! They don’t need to be comin’ in here. You got the baby and you got your husband, and it ain’t any of anybody’s business. You let fam’ly in. Dat’s all.”
“Don’ let strangers in yo’ house. Dey might come back and kill ya’ll or take sumpin.”
She liked me to show her my clothes hanging in my closet. “Oooh, dats putty. Try dat on. Why you not wear’n that? You should wear dat for your husband. How come you don’t? I’d wear it if you don’t. Mmm, hmm.” We wore the same size, a 10/12 and I sometimes gave her a garment she admired. “If you don’t want somethin’ you let me know! My cousins can wear it and the babies. I’ll take it to ’em when I go to my house in Alabama.”
“You should wear ALL your jew’lry, every DAY.” She emphasized in a soft, staccato voice.
I guess she was giving me lessons on how to live like the rich women she worked for.
I started dressing up more, putting on matching costume jewelry every day, and Emma gave the okay to my outfits before I left the house. I sort of enjoyed it, basking in her “expert” approval. After all, I thought, she was affirming my own taste in clothes.
If another woman popped into my house, say, someone from church or a friend, she’d suspiciously ask me, “Who is Dat.”
“They’re from my church.”
“Uh huh,” she’d agree like that didn’t matter …”So, what they doing over here? This ain’t Sunday. Does she have her OWN husban’? She ought not to be in you’ house. Nuh, UH.”
“But she’s my friend.”
“Well, you can go out and see her. Go som’place. She doesn’t need to be in your house all the day. You’re too bizzy. You got a husband and a baby…”
I remembered something in the bible that confirmed that older women should stay in their own homes and not be busybodies, but take care of their own children and husbands. It occurred to me there could possibly be far fewer affairs and divorces that way.
(c)2012 Athena Marler Creamer, All Rights Reserved.